About five and half years ago, I came to Columbus from China. I had never thought I would become a Christian some day. But my journey indeed started since then. Before coming to the United States, I only heard about “Christian” once in my whole life. So when I came to Columbus, I did not apply for a Christian host family. Most of my friends had a Christian host family at that time. Or at least a Christian picked them up from the airport. And then when school began, I met my two roommates. One is a boy; he had a very nice Christian host family. And the other one is a girl who had been a Christian for five years. Both of them kept inviting me to the bible study or church. I always said: no, I had other things to do, I don’t wanna go. But they did not give up asking. Sometimes, they said: you can go to eat or make friends. Finally, I went to a bible study a couple of times. Not because I was interested, but because I did not want to disappoint my friends. But I remember, after eating, when they had bible study, I hid my face behind the bible so no one could tell I was asleep. To be honest, at that time, I thought I would never ever be a Christian. I was super confident that nothing they said or did for almost three years would change my mind. So after graduating from school, I still did not believe in God. But I had a feeling that Christian people are different, they are warm-hearted, nice, and peaceful. Then I went to Los Angeles for work, but before I left Columbus, I got to know a girl who had been a Christian for a long time through my old Chinese classmate. She gave me a Christian bookmark. When I got back home, I put the bookmark somewhere. Life in Los Angeles was quite different as in Columbus. While living in Los Angeles, I had not heard anything about God and Christianity. Instead, there were so many temptations. I still maintained I would have nothing to do with Christianity. After working half of a year there, I lost the only chance to get my working visa. I decided to come back to Columbus, to be with my boyfriend (Bill). When I moved back to Columbus, I stayed home while Bill was still studying in school. I thought the reunion with Bill could bring me a happier life. But we started fighting with each other. After half a year, we got married. I thought marriage could bring me a happier life. But we kept fighting with each other more and more. We used to be a happy and sweet couple. We have lots of good memories. I did not know why everything changed. I tried many things to fix our problem. I talked a lot with my family and friends. I read some emotion control books. None of them helped. So I fell into a deep despair and agony. I had A lot of anger, hate and regret. I wanted to save my life, to save my marriage, but I didn’t know how. One day, when I was organizing my home, I saw that Christian bookmark my friend had given me. Instead of rejecting Christianity as before, at that moment, I really had a strong feeling that I should try to know more about Christianity. Maybe this is the last thing I should try for life. So I called my friend (who gave me the bookmark) and told her I was interested in knowing more about God. She was very surprised. And then she started reading bible with me. But I still did not believe God yet. I just wanted to have some Christian characteristics like Peace, patience and kindness. Then I went to a Christian activity with my friend and that is where I met a girl whose name was Sunny. Sunny introduced me to the IFI wives group bible study. In wives group, we share our life and read bible together every week. I learned more and more, and I also got lots of support from other wives. Their behaviors influenced me, and their stories inspired me. Our wives group leader Rebecca shared with me a lot of things about love and Christian marriage. She encouraged me to pray and ask God for help. Then I learned that love is patient, love is kind. Instead of fighting with my husband, I should fight with myself. And I started praying to God, especially when I was controlled by anger, impatience, selfishness and all the things from Satan’s world. 


While I already believed God, my faith was unstable. And then I met more friends through IFI. We get together to share our life and talk about bible verse. I remember my friend explained the meaning of “asking Christ into your heart” to me. Then I asked Christ into my heart. And I confessed I am a sinner and asked forgiveness for my sins. I also asked God to work on me and my marriage. I was expecting fewer fights and more peace. But sometimes, after I had a big fight with my husband, I started doubting God. But with the encouragement of all my Christian friends, I did not give up. I continued reading the bible and having conversations with Christian friends. I always feel very thankful and peaceful after I meet friends. I have learned that my acceptance, security and significance can only come from God. I have learned that God does not always make my circumstances easy, but he will give me love to live. I am so thankful God is talking with me through all my Christian friends. One of my friends also shared with me about how God helped their marriage getting better and better. It really inspired me. I realized I should rely on my Lord; I should place my life in his hand. I should fully trust him and let him be my master. So with the help of all my brothers and sisters, I am growing a lot. And my life is changing through God’s Grace. Sometimes, I still have arguments with my husband, but I am willing to apologize to my husband and come to God asking his help. Sometimes, when I have negative opinions, I also ask God to help me to get rid of them. I clearly remember, about one year ago, I did not like praying. Especially when I was mad, I always forgot God. I even said “ go away God, don’t talk to me, leave me alone”. But God is with me and loving me all the time. He keeps talking with me and helping me. He is always showing me his grace and forgiving me. I always talk with God, and I always pray that I can be more committed to God. Then in this August, I finally got baptized after my long and hard journey. 

So when I look back, I always feel very amazing. I even cannot believe this miracle happened to me. Then I realize God can make anything impossible to possible. God is seeking me all the time. I want to tell my story to more and more people. I want to abide in God’s words. And I have a strong feeling I should help other non-believers as my friends helped me. So one day when the leader of our wives group introduced ISEED program to me, I was very excited. Through this program, I will learn what it means to be a disciple of Jesus, how to apply biblical principle in all areas of my life and how to tell others about Jesus. I applied this program and I became an ISEEDer. I am growing in this program and learning more about God. And my life becomes better and better. I really want to share with you about my exciting life. But I will tell you next time.:)